








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 606 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 208 matches | ||
| Faceit | 101 matches | ||
| Wingman | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4087 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,911 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3117 | 29% |
| Smokes | 3040 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1743 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 3011 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,188,383 of utility $139 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 211 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FaceFirst | 61% | 28 |
| #2 | jojo :) skinport.com | 53% | 169 |
| #3 | ☢Carnage ♿ | 48% | 40 |
| #4 | penguin 💙💜💚💛🧡❤ | 38% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FaceFirst | 61% | 28 |
| #2 | jojo :) skinport.com | 53% | 169 |
| #3 | ☢Carnage ♿ | 48% | 40 |
| #4 | penguin 💙💜💚💛🧡❤ | 38% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jojo :) skinport.com | 19 | 0.0055 |
| #2 | ☢Carnage ♿ | 3 | 0.0034 |
| #3 | penguin 💙💜💚💛🧡❤ | 2 | 0.0045 |
| #4 | FaceFirst | 1 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jojo :) skinport.com | 630 | 0.18 | 12 min |
| #2 | penguin 💙💜💚💛🧡❤ | 131 | 0.29 | 4 min |
| #3 | ☢Carnage ♿ | 98 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #4 | FaceFirst | 39 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sisar | +1.58 | 68 | 53 |
| #2 | ☢Carnage ♿ | +1.09 | 71 | 66 |
| #3 | penguin 💙💜💚💛🧡❤ | -0.10 | 68 | 69 |
| #4 | jojo :) skinport.com | -1.18 | 51 | 56 |
| #5 | FaceFirst | -3.20 | 28 | 31 |





