








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 313 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 162 matches | ||
| Faceit | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2953 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,870 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1983 | 20% |
| Smokes | 3134 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 2310 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2443 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $962,959 of utility $152 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 25 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ma$o | 67% | 83 |
| #2 | MasterZynfu | 62% | 42 |
| #3 | Roronoa Zoro | 59% | 93 |
| #4 | deagle | 59% | 164 |
| #5 | Archtic | 58% | 72 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | deagle | 14 | 0.0039 |
| #2 | aomine daiki- | 7 | 0.0032 |
| #3 | Tanka Jahari | 5 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | Roronoa Zoro | 4 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | Box Muncher | 3 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | deagle | 555 | 0.16 | 18 min |
| #2 | aomine daiki- | 318 | 0.14 | 9 min |
| #3 | Archtic | 298 | 0.20 | 8 min |
| #4 | Roronoa Zoro | 173 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #5 | ma$o | 165 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | deagle | +1.97 | 64 | 71 |
| #2 | JETS FAN | +1.39 | 60 | 59 |
| #3 | aomine daiki- | +1.08 | 79 | 64 |
| #4 | ma$o | +0.89 | 62 | 68 |
| #5 | Tanka Jahari | +0.23 | 57 | 47 |





