








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 43 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
861 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,674 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 268 | 16% |
| Smokes | 339 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 467 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 600 | 36% |
Our logs show you have wasted $350,440 of utility $175 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 6 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | stoneislate | 65% | 17 |
| #2 | HeavyFire | 58% | 38 |
| #3 | TRASH STAR | 56% | 32 |
| #4 | uuquuquuquu | 56% | 9 |
| #5 | plenin | 53% | 55 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | SKeeT_ | 50% | 10 |
| #7 | Fabayen | 50% | 42 |
| #8 | jezpah | 48% | 61 |
| #9 | ππππΈπ½ππ | 43% | 68 |
| #10 | Westmo | 38% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fabayen | 4 | 0.0047 |
| #2 | ππππΈπ½ππ | 3 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | plenin | 3 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | TRASH STAR | 2 | 0.0031 |
| #5 | jezpah | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jezpah | 323 | 0.26 | 10 min |
| #2 | ππππΈπ½ππ | 296 | 0.22 | 8 min |
| #3 | TRASH STAR | 210 | 0.32 | 7 min |
| #4 | plenin | 186 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #5 | HeavyFire | 136 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SKeeT_ | +3.92 | 96 | 66 |
| #2 | jezpah | +3.43 | 89 | 73 |
| #3 | TRASH STAR | +1.93 | 86 | 72 |
| #4 | stoneislate | +1.79 | 76 | 57 |
| #5 | Fabayen | +1.32 | 79 | 47 |





