








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 54 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 106 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1338 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,268 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2251 | 36% |
| Smokes | 1628 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 855 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 1534 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $283,760 of utility $85 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 5 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Henrik | 63% | 16 |
| #2 | jezpah | 52% | 109 |
| #3 | eros | 52% | 46 |
| #4 | Fabayen | 52% | 92 |
| #5 | plenin | 52% | 93 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | SKeeT_ | 44% | 16 |
| #8 | Yung Bert | 43% | 68 |
| #9 | TRASH STAR | 41% | 37 |
| #10 | HeavyFire | 37% | 30 |
| #11 | Westmo | 36% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | plenin | 5 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | SKeeT_ | 3 | 0.0087 |
| #3 | Fabayen | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | Henrik | 2 | 0.0061 |
| #5 | jezpah | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jezpah | 560 | 0.25 | 17 min |
| #2 | plenin | 382 | 0.19 | 8 min |
| #3 | eros | 240 | 0.25 | 7 min |
| #4 | TRASH STAR | 230 | 0.30 | 8 min |
| #5 | HeavyFire | 93 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jezpah | +3.49 | 90 | 71 |
| #2 | TRASH STAR | +2.51 | 87 | 75 |
| #3 | SKeeT_ | +1.46 | 92 | 63 |
| #4 | Henrik | +1.17 | 68 | 51 |
| #5 | eros | +0.49 | 65 | 65 |





