








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 155 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 39 matches | ||
| Faceit | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 14 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 6 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 22 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4095 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,851 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 843 | 5% |
| Smokes | 5523 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 4294 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 5191 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $867,177 of utility $73 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 330 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Der Anker | 55% | 139 |
| #2 | Zeneth | 52% | 179 |
| #3 | Dawner. | 52% | 114 |
| #4 | IceburgLaLechuga | 51% | 402 |
| #5 | Tingus Pingus | 51% | 145 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pegasus | +1.59 | 41 | 42 |
| #2 | Tingus Pingus | +1.27 | 36 | 44 |
| #3 | Zeneth | +1.12 | 35 | 46 |
| #4 | Der Anker | +0.90 | 51 | 62 |
| #5 | IceburgLaLechuga | -0.70 | 52 | 31 |





