








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 66 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 304 matches | ||
| Wingman | 94 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Faceit | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




33 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4331 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,008 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3511 | 19% |
| Smokes | 5064 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 4792 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 4641 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,357,802 of utility $130 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 579 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zavi | 52% | 60 |
| #2 | JimsBind006 | 51% | 150 |
| #3 | -Icarus | 50% | 30 |
| #4 | Blue Ball Bouncer | 49% | 108 |
| #5 | ReXღ ツ | 47% | 308 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | harris | 44% | 39 |
| #11 | ♣ Dilly | 43% | 74 |
| #12 | Bnaugs | 42% | 53 |
| #13 | 1,000 Denials | 38% | 37 |
| #14 | я ē 𝗯 ù 𝐤 | 37% | 98 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ReXღ ツ | 16 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | JimsBind006 | 7 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | ♣ Dilly | 7 | 0.0046 |
| #4 | zavi | 7 | 0.0057 |
| #5 | Bnaugs | 3 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ReXღ ツ | 894 | 0.15 | 23 min |
| #2 | JimsBind006 | 336 | 0.11 | 11 min |
| #3 | String Bean | 314 | 0.27 | 8 min |
| #4 | я ē 𝗯 ù 𝐤 | 270 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #5 | Blue Ball Bouncer | 269 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JimsBind006 | +2.43 | 65 | 63 |
| #2 | ReXღ ツ | +1.49 | 65 | 58 |
| #3 | Genericapplesauce | +1.24 | 67 | 61 |
| #4 | 1,000 Denials | +1.05 | 79 | 63 |
| #5 | я ē 𝗯 ù 𝐤 | +0.32 | 77 | 59 |





