








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 41 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 85 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
750 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,659 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 825 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1134 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 970 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 730 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $195,069 of utility $79 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 18 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Duck. | 50% | 10 |
| #2 | I unbound duck | 44% | 32 |
| #3 | Sheep | 42% | 31 |
| #4 | 鸭子 | 40% | 35 |
| #5 | Binoms | 35% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | 鸭子 | 40% | 35 |
| #5 | Binoms | 35% | 48 |
| #6 | Dolby | 35% | 37 |
| #7 | Burst_Frame | 32% | 22 |
| #8 | Shadow Duck | 26% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | I unbound duck | 9 | 0.0133 |
| #2 | Shadow Duck | 6 | 0.0082 |
| #3 | Dolby | 6 | 0.0082 |
| #4 | 鸭子 | 2 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | Duck. | 2 | 0.0091 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | I unbound duck | 59 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #2 | Dolby | 52 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #3 | Shadow Duck | 51 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #4 | Binoms | 38 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #5 | 鸭子 | 36 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Duck. | +7.42 | 92 | 71 |
| #2 | I unbound duck | +6.30 | 87 | 73 |
| #3 | Dolby | +0.78 | 62 | 56 |
| #4 | 鸭子 | -0.04 | 49 | 45 |
| #5 | Shadow Duck | -1.32 | 52 | 53 |





