








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 107 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 283 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3213 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,399 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1510 | 20% |
| Smokes | 1880 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1599 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 2410 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,178,808 of utility $174 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 238 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Esteban | 58% | 33 |
| #2 | duck lover | 52% | 23 |
| #3 | Duck. | 51% | 45 |
| #4 | I unbound duck | 47% | 91 |
| #5 | Sheep | 45% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Burst_Frame | 41% | 39 |
| #7 | Binoms | 41% | 93 |
| #8 | Shadow Duck | 41% | 170 |
| #9 | Expensive Decoy | 40% | 35 |
| #10 | Dolby | 38% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | I unbound duck | 11 | 0.0058 |
| #2 | Shadow Duck | 10 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | Binoms | 5 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | Dolby | 5 | 0.0081 |
| #5 | Duck. | 4 | 0.0042 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shadow Duck | 242 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| #2 | I unbound duck | 127 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #3 | Expensive Decoy | 97 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #4 | Binoms | 83 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #5 | Duck. | 73 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | I unbound duck | +4.44 | 89 | 66 |
| #2 | Duck. | +3.99 | 85 | 68 |
| #3 | Dolby | +3.21 | 86 | 66 |
| #4 | Esteban | +2.98 | 85 | 64 |
| #5 | duck lover | -0.82 | 61 | 37 |





