








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 85 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 40 matches | ||
| Faceit | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
775 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,903 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 406 | 14% |
| Smokes | 882 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 751 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 864 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $371,331 of utility $156 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 17 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bRUTUS | 67% | 9 |
| #2 | skutsi +rep | 60% | 10 |
| #3 | Swagalee | 58% | 12 |
| #4 | KRR#17 | 57% | 7 |
| #5 | sasu123 | 56% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #14 | Reiska | 37% | 19 |
| #15 | SirErnamo | 35% | 26 |
| #16 | 125liffe | 33% | 9 |
| #17 | ipurnauju | 30% | 10 |
| #18 | senseivuu | 30% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Reiska | 5 | 0.0123 |
| #2 | MURSU | 4 | 0.0132 |
| #3 | senseivuu | 2 | 0.0087 |
| #4 | 125liffe | 2 | 0.0108 |
| #5 | Simo | 2 | 0.0125 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SirErnamo | 82 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #2 | kuidemæn | 60 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #3 | Reiska | 51 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #4 | MURSU | 48 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #5 | Jonddde | 47 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KRR#17 | +5.07 | 72 | 77 |
| #2 | MURSU | +4.20 | 80 | 64 |
| #3 | sasu123 | +3.18 | 71 | 65 |
| #4 | bRUTUS | +2.13 | 71 | 64 |
| #5 | DimEEE | +1.86 | 60 | 16 |





