








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 869 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 468 matches | ||
| Faceit | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 44 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




37 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4797 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,283 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3975 | 26% |
| Smokes | 4266 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 3092 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 3950 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,320,101 of utility $194 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1330 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Smuckerz | 61% | 51 |
| #2 | NoPromise | 58% | 31 |
| #3 | dis_pc | 52% | 83 |
| #4 | exolample | 49% | 75 |
| #5 | Cheetos | 49% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | dis_pc | 52% | 83 |
| #4 | exolample | 49% | 75 |
| #5 | Cheetos | 49% | 53 |
| #6 | Levin | 42% | 31 |
| #7 | LIMEDY | 41% | 112 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LIMEDY | 14 | 0.0059 |
| #2 | exolample | 8 | 0.0050 |
| #3 | Cheetos | 4 | 0.0035 |
| #4 | Smuckerz | 4 | 0.0037 |
| #5 | dis_pc | 2 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dis_pc | 393 | 0.23 | 8 min |
| #2 | LIMEDY | 325 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #3 | exolample | 218 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #4 | Levin | 131 | 0.20 | 4 min |
| #5 | Smuckerz | 123 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NoPromise | +3.93 | 59 | 43 |
| #2 | Smuckerz | +2.27 | 56 | 49 |
| #3 | exolample | +1.47 | 76 | 61 |
| #4 | dis_pc | +1.33 | 44 | 69 |
| #5 | Cheetos | +0.11 | 70 | 54 |





