








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 235 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Ancient | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1644 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,050 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 572 | 14% |
| Smokes | 1007 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1263 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 1208 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,186,580 of utility $324 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 99 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wtfnick | 60% | 25 |
| #2 | Wazuk | 50% | 76 |
| #3 | Thesuperfan | 48% | 159 |
| #4 | Flyerrrx | 45% | 95 |
| #5 | MoneyDownTheDrain.com | 43% | 95 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Flyerrrx | 28 | 0.0151 |
| #2 | Thesuperfan | 23 | 0.0074 |
| #3 | Wazuk | 20 | 0.0133 |
| #4 | ChickendasHuhn | 19 | 0.0149 |
| #5 | MoneyDownTheDrain.com | 17 | 0.0090 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Thesuperfan | 444 | 0.14 | 11 min |
| #2 | MoneyDownTheDrain.com | 207 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #3 | Flyerrrx | 148 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #4 | ChickendasHuhn | 69 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | Wazuk | 66 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Thesuperfan | +3.22 | 86 | 63 |
| #2 | Wazuk | +3.08 | 54 | 38 |
| #3 | wtfnick | +2.05 | 83 | 33 |
| #4 | Melone | +1.26 | 41 | 43 |
| #5 | MoneyDownTheDrain.com | -1.60 | 41 | 41 |





