








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 113 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 117 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 20 matches | ||
| Faceit | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4752 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,941 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3511 | 23% |
| Smokes | 4390 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 3089 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 3951 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,162,701 of utility $117 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 243 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ☛iSo ツ | 85% | 26 |
| #2 | COME TO BRAZIL | 70% | 30 |
| #3 | nosnibors | 59% | 182 |
| #4 | dangaLange | 58% | 129 |
| #5 | fak | 57% | 160 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | dangaLange | 58% | 129 |
| #5 | fak | 57% | 160 |
| #6 | s1ck0 | 55% | 158 |
| #7 | business owner | 52% | 124 |
| #8 | k | 50% | 68 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | s1ck0 | 14 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | nosnibors | 13 | 0.0036 |
| #3 | fak | 12 | 0.0039 |
| #4 | business owner | 7 | 0.0030 |
| #5 | dangaLange | 5 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nosnibors | 1007 | 0.28 | 28 min |
| #2 | fak | 451 | 0.15 | 12 min |
| #3 | business owner | 414 | 0.18 | 10 min |
| #4 | s1ck0 | 410 | 0.14 | 10 min |
| #5 | dangaLange | 389 | 0.16 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | COME TO BRAZIL | +6.65 | 84 | 85 |
| #2 | nosnibors | +5.04 | 82 | 86 |
| #3 | ☛iSo ツ | +3.68 | 79 | 66 |
| #4 | fak | +3.09 | 78 | 54 |
| #5 | CPT | +0.67 | 71 | 63 |





