








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 629 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 130 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 67 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 42 matches | ||
| Premier | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 23 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4564 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,358 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2889 | 31% |
| Smokes | 3012 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 1937 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1520 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,451,283 of utility $142 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 392 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | XxSCARHx | 54% | 230 |
| #2 | DV | 53% | 30 |
| #3 | Jack | 53% | 274 |
| #4 | The Cynical Wanderer | 49% | 158 |
| #5 | Baylayhuh | 44% | 73 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Jack | 53% | 274 |
| #4 | The Cynical Wanderer | 49% | 158 |
| #5 | Baylayhuh | 44% | 73 |
| #6 | Harrison | 40% | 134 |
| #7 | k4h | 36% | 264 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jack | 24 | 0.0045 |
| #2 | The Cynical Wanderer | 24 | 0.0077 |
| #3 | Harrison | 9 | 0.0036 |
| #4 | XxSCARHx | 6 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | k4h | 4 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | The Cynical Wanderer | 293 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #2 | Harrison | 158 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #3 | Jack | 89 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #4 | XxSCARHx | 73 | 0.02 | 2 min |
| #5 | DV | 39 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Frazzle247 | +4.90 | 56 | 48 |
| #2 | DV | +1.91 | 56 | 52 |
| #3 | XxSCARHx | +0.06 | 29 | 34 |
| #4 | Jack | -0.91 | 24 | 18 |
| #5 | Baylayhuh | -1.99 | 41 | 21 |





