








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 676 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 191 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 26 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 51 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3056 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,977 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2439 | 27% |
| Smokes | 3429 | 38% |
| HE Grenades | 2281 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 828 | 9% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,745,015 of utility $249 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 377 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Frisette | 53% | 172 |
| #2 | baLt | 50% | 170 |
| #3 | isonnn | 47% | 209 |
| #4 | Necrons | 46% | 102 |
| #5 | Anto6 | 46% | 166 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | isonnn | 22 | 0.0051 |
| #2 | baLt | 16 | 0.0046 |
| #3 | Frisette | 16 | 0.0046 |
| #4 | Anto6 | 9 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | Necrons | 3 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | isonnn | 1003 | 0.23 | 27 min |
| #2 | Frisette | 702 | 0.20 | 16 min |
| #3 | baLt | 449 | 0.13 | 13 min |
| #4 | Necrons | 276 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #5 | Anto6 | 223 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Frisette | +1.67 | 72 | 66 |
| #2 | isonnn | +1.22 | 57 | 70 |
| #3 | baLt | +1.13 | 64 | 65 |
| #4 | Necrons | -0.14 | 54 | 67 |
| #5 | Bouclette | -0.60 | 58 | 59 |





