








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 190 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 142 matches | ||
| Faceit | 82 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 37 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3258 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,944 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2854 | 22% |
| Smokes | 3203 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 3254 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 3633 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $621,873 of utility $88 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 333 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BrodyJ | 59% | 37 |
| #2 | botshit | 55% | 96 |
| #3 | Pleeqi | 55% | 119 |
| #4 | Lycii | 52% | 203 |
| #5 | Uncle Gubsy | 49% | 81 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Pleeqi | 55% | 119 |
| #4 | Lycii | 52% | 203 |
| #5 | Uncle Gubsy | 49% | 81 |
| #6 | Chewnez | 49% | 110 |
| #7 | Lemon | 38% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lycii | 9 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | Chewnez | 6 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | botshit | 6 | 0.0030 |
| #4 | Uncle Gubsy | 4 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | Pleeqi | 2 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lycii | 935 | 0.21 | 28 min |
| #2 | Chewnez | 498 | 0.21 | 14 min |
| #3 | Pleeqi | 322 | 0.13 | 9 min |
| #4 | Uncle Gubsy | 271 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #5 | botshit | 176 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BrodyJ | +2.35 | 78 | 67 |
| #2 | Lycii | +1.14 | 73 | 73 |
| #3 | Reign | +0.89 | 64 | 55 |
| #4 | Pleeqi | -0.28 | 69 | 69 |
| #5 | Chewnez | -0.44 | 64 | 72 |





