








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 389 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1212 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,518 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1013 | 29% |
| Smokes | 1092 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 501 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 912 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $607,392 of utility $238 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 413 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Number 1 Pomu Rainpuff Fan | 56% | 39 |
| #2 | Number 1 Finana Ryugu Fan | 50% | 8 |
| #3 | Pleesuls | 50% | 8 |
| #4 | Clmet1a | 50% | 12 |
| #5 | crunchy | 50% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Number 1 Finana Ryugu Fan | 50% | 8 |
| #3 | Pleesuls | 50% | 8 |
| #4 | Clmet1a | 50% | 12 |
| #5 | crunchy | 50% | 14 |
| #6 | Number 1 Nyanners Fan | 27% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Number 1 Pomu Rainpuff Fan | 5 | 0.0061 |
| #2 | Number 1 Nyanners Fan | 3 | 0.0132 |
| #3 | crunchy | 2 | 0.0071 |
| #4 | Clmet1a | 2 | 0.0081 |
| #5 | Number 1 Finana Ryugu Fan | 2 | 0.0111 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Number 1 Pomu Rainpuff Fan | 132 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #2 | Number 1 Nyanners Fan | 26 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #3 | Number 1 Finana Ryugu Fan | 20 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #4 | crunchy | 16 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #5 | Clmet1a | 10 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pleesuls | +3.09 | 47 | 47 |
| #2 | Zekken | +2.62 | 67 | 64 |
| #3 | Number 1 Pomu Rainpuff Fan | +1.40 | 56 | 51 |
| #4 | Clmet1a | +0.38 | 58 | 44 |
| #5 | Number 1 Nyanners Fan | -0.24 | 63 | 68 |





