








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 80 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 61 matches | ||
| Premier | 53 matches | ||
| Faceit | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2989 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,862 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2204 | 32% |
| Smokes | 1673 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1689 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1296 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $471,513 of utility $96 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1 message into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rock | 58% | 12 |
| #2 | miLLahdakiLLah | 58% | 24 |
| #3 | Goose™ | 56% | 32 |
| #4 | Dusty ヅ | 56% | 50 |
| #5 | ✪Traxs | 53% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Dusty ヅ | 56% | 50 |
| #5 | ✪Traxs | 53% | 17 |
| #6 | Paul Blurt | 53% | 51 |
| #7 | BigDickNick77 | 51% | 37 |
| #8 | Archer | 50% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dusty ヅ | 3 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | Paul Blurt | 3 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | BigDickNick77 | 3 | 0.0039 |
| #4 | Goose™ | 2 | 0.0029 |
| #5 | ✪Traxs | 2 | 0.0054 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dusty ヅ | 186 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #2 | miLLahdakiLLah | 137 | 0.27 | 3 min |
| #3 | Paul Blurt | 111 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #4 | Goose™ | 86 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #5 | Archer | 84 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Swazzy | +3.32 | 77 | 56 |
| #2 | Dusty ヅ | +3.00 | 85 | 60 |
| #3 | ✪Traxs | +2.26 | 86 | 45 |
| #4 | miLLahdakiLLah | +0.41 | 69 | 69 |
| #5 | Paul Blurt | +0.37 | 70 | 52 |





