








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 679 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 253 matches | ||
| Faceit | 212 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 42 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4727 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,539 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2970 | 22% |
| Smokes | 1940 | 14% |
| HE Grenades | 4277 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 4352 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,594,410 of utility $142 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 549 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Carrie | 67% | 30 |
| #2 | JordanWhattt | 60% | 52 |
| #3 | CraMdeN | 53% | 55 |
| #4 | M1ckW1ck | 52% | 82 |
| #5 | HuntW1ck | 52% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | erock | 49% | 202 |
| #10 | ClevieWonder | 49% | 35 |
| #11 | DankLettuce | 48% | 31 |
| #12 | BananA | 42% | 33 |
| #13 | CAJUN PIG | 40% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gearslayer360 | 6 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | erock | 4 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | JordanWhattt | 3 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | DJ Jazzy Jess | 2 | 0.0004 |
| #5 | LowCiel | 2 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M1ckW1ck | 716 | 0.40 | 16 min |
| #2 | Gearslayer360 | 674 | 0.28 | 16 min |
| #3 | erock | 332 | 0.08 | 9 min |
| #4 | JordanWhattt | 235 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| #5 | CraMdeN | 192 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DankLettuce | +2.36 | 74 | 66 |
| #2 | CraMdeN | +1.46 | 68 | 62 |
| #3 | Gearslayer360 | +1.41 | 62 | 60 |
| #4 | JordanWhattt | +1.07 | 74 | 63 |
| #5 | Sinbad | +0.33 | 44 | 58 |





