








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 21 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
502 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,712 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 433 | 25% |
| Smokes | 443 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 438 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 398 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $104,272 of utility $111 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 47 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Just1ce | 42% | 24 |
| #2 | xeace | 40% | 5 |
| #3 | Miellie | 40% | 10 |
| #4 | 2kLuZ | 33% | 3 |
| #5 | Ambiguous27 | 32% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Miellie | 40% | 10 |
| #4 | 2kLuZ | 33% | 3 |
| #5 | Ambiguous27 | 32% | 19 |
| #6 | kinz | 30% | 20 |
| #7 | O-Blivius | 25% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kinz | 3 | 0.0072 |
| #2 | Just1ce | 1 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | O-Blivius | 1 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kinz | 182 | 0.44 | 6 min |
| #2 | Just1ce | 89 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #3 | O-Blivius | 68 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #4 | Ambiguous27 | 49 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #5 | Miellie | 21 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 2kLuZ | +4.38 | 66 | 57 |
| #2 | SaberXqt™ | +2.51 | 76 | 57 |
| #3 | Just1ce | +0.46 | 83 | 48 |
| #4 | Ambiguous27 | -0.67 | 68 | 55 |
| #5 | O-Blivius | -0.79 | 68 | 70 |





