








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 113 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 135 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 46 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1241 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,512 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 779 | 17% |
| Smokes | 818 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 1504 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 1411 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $898,161 of utility $237 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 17 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 2008 Honda Civic | 59% | 37 |
| #2 | 💜Jasmine💚 | 59% | 22 |
| #3 | That Sucks | 58% | 12 |
| #4 | Notably | 52% | 50 |
| #5 | Will | 45% | 136 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | 💜Jasmine💚 | 59% | 22 |
| #3 | That Sucks | 58% | 12 |
| #4 | Notably | 52% | 50 |
| #5 | Will | 45% | 136 |
| #6 | what do? | 43% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Will | 25 | 0.0088 |
| #2 | 2008 Honda Civic | 5 | 0.0068 |
| #3 | Notably | 4 | 0.0038 |
| #4 | 💜Jasmine💚 | 1 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | That Sucks | 1 | 0.0042 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Will | 1091 | 0.38 | 28 min |
| #2 | 💜Jasmine💚 | 214 | 0.46 | 6 min |
| #3 | 2008 Honda Civic | 187 | 0.25 | 5 min |
| #4 | what do? | 32 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #5 | Notably | 29 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 2008 Honda Civic | +4.55 | 68 | 69 |
| #2 | Notably | +1.38 | 64 | 64 |
| #3 | Will | -0.21 | 52 | 77 |
| #4 | Scoochert | -1.06 | 58 | 55 |
| #5 | what do? | -1.28 | 73 | 63 |





