








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 36 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 10 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
502 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,639 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 330 | 20% |
| Smokes | 391 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 416 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 502 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $91,217 of utility $98 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 14 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HolyFoxFire | 100% | 3 |
| #2 | ✪ kstrm | 100% | 3 |
| #3 | Fraxel | 63% | 35 |
| #4 | BedPleyar | 63% | 16 |
| #5 | gabbient | 57% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | BedPleyar | 63% | 16 |
| #5 | gabbient | 57% | 23 |
| #6 | kone | 50% | 4 |
| #7 | sPurge | 40% | 5 |
| #8 | mERcilezz | 33% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fraxel | 2 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | gabbient | 1 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BedPleyar | 77 | 0.25 | 2 min |
| #2 | Fraxel | 68 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #3 | gabbient | 29 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #4 | kone | 21 | 0.25 | 1 min |
| #5 | sPurge | 14 | 0.16 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ kstrm | +6.96 | 87 | 44 |
| #2 | BedPleyar | +2.42 | 69 | 76 |
| #3 | Lo_Siento | +2.30 | 70 | 69 |
| #4 | Fraxel | +1.42 | 82 | 62 |
| #5 | HolyFoxFire | +0.66 | 65 | 48 |





