








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 110 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 141 matches | ||
| Wingman | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Premier | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2728 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,050 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2708 | 30% |
| Smokes | 2481 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1550 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 2311 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $570,261 of utility $109 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 127 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | osama rizzladen | 81% | 21 |
| #2 | DestructoDog | 68% | 22 |
| #3 | cya | 68% | 25 |
| #4 | Larry5k | 67% | 163 |
| #5 | Kado | 67% | 95 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | mac | 64% | 126 |
| #7 | omoo | 62% | 146 |
| #8 | ππΆπ | 58% | 69 |
| #9 | emblem | 56% | 77 |
| #10 | Pandaβ’ | 55% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mac | 13 | 0.0050 |
| #2 | Kado | 13 | 0.0068 |
| #3 | Larry5k | 11 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | omoo | 7 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | emblem | 5 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mac | 776 | 0.30 | 23 min |
| #2 | Larry5k | 627 | 0.18 | 20 min |
| #3 | omoo | 537 | 0.17 | 14 min |
| #4 | Kado | 326 | 0.17 | 10 min |
| #5 | ππΆπ | 221 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | osama rizzladen | +4.66 | 82 | 77 |
| #2 | omoo | +1.84 | 86 | 56 |
| #3 | Flash | +1.38 | 73 | 66 |
| #4 | Pandaβ’ | +1.07 | 76 | 79 |
| #5 | Larry5k | +0.94 | 81 | 72 |





