








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 259 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 311 matches | ||
| Renown | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




22 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3827 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,139 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3937 | 30% |
| Smokes | 3429 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2562 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 3211 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $950,285 of utility $127 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 115 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SeiSchlauWählBlau1888 | 58% | 24 |
| #2 | Koko | 57% | 191 |
| #3 | Jägermeister | 55% | 185 |
| #4 | Fisulino | 50% | 20 |
| #5 | Lebanon Blames | 49% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Fisulino | 50% | 20 |
| #5 | Lebanon Blames | 49% | 39 |
| #6 | [PGA] Waster | 47% | 126 |
| #7 | 𝕊𝔼𝟞 | 46% | 151 |
| #8 | [PGA]marlboro | 46% | 114 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Koko | 43 | 0.0108 |
| #2 | 𝕊𝔼𝟞 | 26 | 0.0085 |
| #3 | Jägermeister | 14 | 0.0037 |
| #4 | Lebanon Blames | 8 | 0.0105 |
| #5 | [PGA] Waster | 7 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Koko | 397 | 0.10 | 11 min |
| #2 | [PGA] Waster | 199 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #3 | Jägermeister | 198 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| #4 | 𝕊𝔼𝟞 | 142 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #5 | [PGA]marlboro | 123 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Koko | +2.84 | 74 | 69 |
| #2 | Crown | +1.78 | 67 | 65 |
| #3 | SeiSchlauWählBlau1888 | +0.36 | 53 | 50 |
| #4 | [PGA] Waster | -0.04 | 64 | 65 |
| #5 | Lebanon Blames | -0.24 | 56 | 34 |





