








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 96 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 96 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 31 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1626 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,072 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1845 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1716 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1959 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1552 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $591,293 of utility $157 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 432 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MadBro | 62% | 13 |
| #2 | Gucci_Flip flops*** | 53% | 30 |
| #3 | f0rez` | 49% | 43 |
| #4 | KP | 48% | 23 |
| #5 | ✪ aIZPUTNiEKS | 47% | 74 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | ✪ aIZPUTNiEKS | 47% | 74 |
| #6 | ROCKstar | 47% | 15 |
| #7 | Z-ODY | 46% | 109 |
| #8 | enc1sh | 44% | 16 |
| #9 | ⭕⃤ Čiekurs °•. | 33% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | f0rez` | 8 | 0.0086 |
| #2 | Z-ODY | 7 | 0.0030 |
| #3 | KP | 2 | 0.0038 |
| #4 | ✪ aIZPUTNiEKS | 1 | 0.0006 |
| #5 | Gucci_Flip flops*** | 1 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Z-ODY | 408 | 0.17 | 10 min |
| #2 | ✪ aIZPUTNiEKS | 179 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #3 | f0rez` | 129 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #4 | Gucci_Flip flops*** | 126 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #5 | enc1sh | 96 | 0.28 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KP | +1.47 | 65 | 72 |
| #2 | MadBro | +0.91 | 70 | 67 |
| #3 | f0rez` | +0.76 | 56 | 64 |
| #4 | ⭕⃤ Čiekurs °•. | +0.54 | 62 | 76 |
| #5 | Z-ODY | +0.07 | 47 | 65 |





