








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 18 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 119 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1195 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,071 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2263 | 28% |
| Smokes | 2468 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 2120 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1220 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $305,638 of utility $80 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 39 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MadBro | 64% | 14 |
| #2 | enc1sh | 62% | 26 |
| #3 | Cidrins | 53% | 30 |
| #4 | f0rez` | 49% | 49 |
| #5 | ⭕⃤ Čiekurs °•. | 48% | 52 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | ⭕⃤ Čiekurs °•. | 48% | 52 |
| #6 | Z-ODY | 48% | 149 |
| #7 | Curtis | 45% | 11 |
| #8 | KP | 43% | 63 |
| #9 | ✪ aIZPUTNiEKS | 39% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Z-ODY | 8 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | KP | 5 | 0.0037 |
| #3 | f0rez` | 3 | 0.0028 |
| #4 | Cidrins | 2 | 0.0030 |
| #5 | ⭕⃤ Čiekurs °•. | 1 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Z-ODY | 530 | 0.16 | 13 min |
| #2 | ⭕⃤ Čiekurs °•. | 182 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #3 | f0rez` | 166 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #4 | KP | 154 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #5 | enc1sh | 142 | 0.26 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ aIZPUTNiEKS | +2.77 | 69 | 79 |
| #2 | f0rez` | +1.77 | 61 | 68 |
| #3 | MadBro | +1.66 | 48 | 62 |
| #4 | Z-ODY | +1.16 | 47 | 69 |
| #5 | ⭕⃤ Čiekurs °•. | +0.76 | 59 | 74 |





