








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 421 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 211 matches | ||
| Wingman | 41 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2099 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,099 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1466 | 18% |
| Smokes | 3198 | 39% |
| HE Grenades | 1556 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 1879 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $938,408 of utility $162 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 23 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bober | 62% | 55 |
| #2 | BMW E91 | 58% | 33 |
| #3 | Gilbört | 46% | 114 |
| #4 | Toyota Yaris | 44% | 118 |
| #5 | Biffen | 42% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | BMW E91 | 58% | 33 |
| #3 | Gilbört | 46% | 114 |
| #4 | Toyota Yaris | 44% | 118 |
| #5 | Biffen | 42% | 48 |
| #6 | taistelujaska | 38% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Toyota Yaris | 7 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | Gilbört | 2 | 0.0008 |
| #3 | Biffen | 2 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | taistelujaska | 2 | 0.0038 |
| #5 | Bober | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Toyota Yaris | 448 | 0.18 | 12 min |
| #2 | Biffen | 329 | 0.32 | 9 min |
| #3 | Gilbört | 281 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #4 | Bober | 211 | 0.20 | 6 min |
| #5 | BMW E91 | 125 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BMW E91 | +3.05 | 63 | 65 |
| #2 | Bober | +2.56 | 69 | 67 |
| #3 | Toyota Yaris | +1.26 | 61 | 63 |
| #4 | taistelujaska | +0.84 | 66 | 53 |
| #5 | nUT | +0.34 | 47 | 55 |





