








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 874 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 260 matches | ||
| Wingman | 101 matches | ||
| Faceit | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 65 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3216 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,311 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3022 | 23% |
| Smokes | 3864 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 3157 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 3268 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,321,069 of utility $144 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 57 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WOJTAS | 48% | 101 |
| #2 | NajPux | 47% | 235 |
| #3 | GRZĄSKI GRZEŚ | 47% | 154 |
| #4 | jose arcadio morales | 45% | 74 |
| #5 | BRUDNY BŁAŻEJ | 44% | 341 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GRZĄSKI GRZEŚ | 14 | 0.0044 |
| #2 | NajPux | 5 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | BRUDNY BŁAŻEJ | 2 | 0.0003 |
| #4 | WOJTAS | 2 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | sava | 2 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WOJTAS | 363 | 0.16 | 9 min |
| #2 | BRUDNY BŁAŻEJ | 340 | 0.05 | 9 min |
| #3 | GRZĄSKI GRZEŚ | 331 | 0.10 | 8 min |
| #4 | NajPux | 305 | 0.06 | 8 min |
| #5 | sava | 215 | 0.11 | 5 min |





