








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 714 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 468 matches | ||
| Premier | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 66 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4881 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,915 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2362 | 22% |
| Smokes | 2885 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2738 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2930 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,620,763 of utility $228 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 63 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | epitome | 54% | 464 |
| #7 | Rayly | 53% | 258 |
| #8 | BromTeque | 52% | 104 |
| #9 | IVK | 51% | 35 |
| #10 | Simen | 49% | 63 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sammy | +2.82 | 71 | 76 |
| #2 | K A I | +2.14 | 79 | 48 |
| #3 | Kelran | +1.44 | 80 | 85 |
| #4 | epitome | -0.43 | 67 | 83 |
| #5 | Simen | -0.54 | 83 | 61 |





