








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 50 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 120 matches | ||
| Premier | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1148 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,114 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 673 | 13% |
| Smokes | 1425 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1502 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1514 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $420,401 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 10 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Kelran | 50% | 132 |
| #8 | rEDU | 38% | 21 |
| #9 | Mindseth | 36% | 11 |
| #10 | Simen | 33% | 9 |
| #11 | IVK | 33% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kelran | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #2 | K A I | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sammy | +4.57 | 79 | 72 |
| #2 | K A I | +2.46 | 83 | 47 |
| #3 | Kelran | +1.28 | 82 | 85 |
| #4 | Simen | +0.82 | 79 | 68 |
| #5 | epitome | +0.37 | 69 | 80 |





