








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 577 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 116 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 30 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




42 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2175 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,199 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2031 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1864 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1834 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1470 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $738,957 of utility $153 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 125 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ahrou | 59% | 29 |
| #2 | BOB | 57% | 63 |
| #3 | Romanian disassembly expert | 55% | 40 |
| #4 | Kivi | 54% | 111 |
| #5 | Greg Paul | 50% | 183 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Kivi | 54% | 111 |
| #5 | Greg Paul | 50% | 183 |
| #6 | Aelius | 48% | 128 |
| #7 | Haaga Hustla 00400 | 40% | 25 |
| #8 | GaBossManNig | 33% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Aelius | 31 | 0.0117 |
| #2 | Greg Paul | 15 | 0.0039 |
| #3 | Romanian disassembly expert | 10 | 0.0127 |
| #4 | Haaga Hustla 00400 | 10 | 0.0251 |
| #5 | Ahrou | 9 | 0.0139 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Greg Paul | 758 | 0.20 | 20 min |
| #2 | Aelius | 536 | 0.20 | 16 min |
| #3 | BOB | 502 | 0.37 | 16 min |
| #4 | Kivi | 294 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #5 | Ahrou | 118 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SPLONETZEMAG | +1.81 | 88 | 62 |
| #2 | BOB | +0.63 | 71 | 79 |
| #3 | Ahrou | +0.60 | 81 | 53 |
| #4 | Aelius | +0.53 | 77 | 57 |
| #5 | Greg Paul | +0.48 | 68 | 76 |





