








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 32 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 27 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
297 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 628 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 150 | 24% |
| Smokes | 187 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 120 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 171 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $76,599 of utility $112 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 5 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | godkU | 100% | 2 |
| #2 | Angbwa | 100% | 5 |
| #3 | PeNguiN5 - stratbase.app | 80% | 5 |
| #4 | ifan | 75% | 4 |
| #5 | Rhys | 64% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | -fluffS- LF3 | 38% | 8 |
| #10 | shoobie | 33% | 3 |
| #11 | marco!!!- | 33% | 6 |
| #12 | ZiimZey cs.money | 0% | 2 |
| #13 | shea | 0% | 2 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jaredd | 82 | 0.22 | 3 min |
| #2 | Rhys | 43 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| #3 | Frosty | 32 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #4 | -fluffS- LF3 | 14 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| #5 | PeNguiN5 - stratbase.app | 13 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yoshwa | +6.11 | 89 | 68 |
| #2 | Angbwa | +2.77 | 89 | 70 |
| #3 | Frosty | +2.08 | 74 | 80 |
| #4 | jaredd | +1.97 | 90 | 79 |
| #5 | Rhys | +1.80 | 71 | 62 |





