








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 106 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Faceit | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1644 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,890 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 923 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1132 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 833 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1002 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $211,054 of utility $104 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 47 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bdinx | 100% | 7 |
| #2 | allstR | 89% | 9 |
| #3 | Leon! | 88% | 8 |
| #4 | CREAM | 88% | 16 |
| #5 | Rhys | 86% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #13 | bond | 65% | 65 |
| #14 | Pitton | 60% | 15 |
| #15 | cig | 58% | 12 |
| #16 | p0le | 57% | 7 |
| #17 | lewis | 33% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bolton | 8 | 0.0124 |
| #2 | bond | 5 | 0.0044 |
| #3 | Trilted | 3 | 0.0074 |
| #4 | CREAM | 3 | 0.0098 |
| #5 | | Mini | the swag boi | 1 | 0.0040 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bolton | 55 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #2 | Frazehh | 50 | 0.32 | 1 min |
| #3 | bond | 49 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #4 | Trilted | 49 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #5 | | Mini | the swag boi | 39 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Angbwa | +6.82 | 89 | 71 |
| #2 | bdinx | +4.61 | 76 | 72 |
| #3 | Bolton | +3.24 | 88 | 51 |
| #4 | Rhys | +2.95 | 67 | 65 |
| #5 | CREAM | +2.72 | 70 | 33 |





