








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 911 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 123 matches | ||
| Wingman | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




31 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1878 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,089 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1058 | 34% |
| Smokes | 564 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 484 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 983 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $725,003 of utility $126 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 323 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Serginn__ | 71% | 17 |
| #2 | Dolceus | 59% | 32 |
| #3 | ⛧𝕭𝕴𝕷𝕴𝕰𝖀𝖃 | 54% | 56 |
| #4 | LN ASHLEIA | 53% | 57 |
| #5 | Kiyweo | 49% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Dolceus | 59% | 32 |
| #3 | ⛧𝕭𝕴𝕷𝕴𝕰𝖀𝖃 | 54% | 56 |
| #4 | LN ASHLEIA | 53% | 57 |
| #5 | Kiyweo | 49% | 53 |
| #6 | l_NeyRoX_l | 48% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⛧𝕭𝕴𝕷𝕴𝕰𝖀𝖃 | 13 | 0.0113 |
| #2 | LN ASHLEIA | 7 | 0.0058 |
| #3 | Kiyweo | 5 | 0.0048 |
| #4 | l_NeyRoX_l | 4 | 0.0045 |
| #5 | Serginn__ | 2 | 0.0055 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⛧𝕭𝕴𝕷𝕴𝕰𝖀𝖃 | 248 | 0.22 | 5 min |
| #2 | LN ASHLEIA | 84 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #3 | Kiyweo | 62 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #4 | l_NeyRoX_l | 60 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | Dolceus | 50 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | l_NeyRoX_l | +2.94 | 39 | 39 |
| #2 | ⛧𝕭𝕴𝕷𝕴𝕰𝖀𝖃 | +2.63 | 60 | 64 |
| #3 | Dolceus | +1.69 | 48 | 44 |
| #4 | LN ASHLEIA | +1.49 | 74 | 53 |
| #5 | Serginn__ | +0.84 | 37 | 65 |





