








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 374 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 209 matches | ||
| Faceit | 76 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3339 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,865 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3629 | 31% |
| Smokes | 3327 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1942 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 2967 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $886,322 of utility $116 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 464 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | |☆◾Mako | 60% | 93 |
| #2 | natsirT. | 56% | 90 |
| #3 | Not Croissant Du Baguette [NCB] | 54% | 129 |
| #4 | Quaticy | 50% | 28 |
| #5 | Cauz :/ | 46% | 67 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | natsirT. | 56% | 90 |
| #3 | Not Croissant Du Baguette [NCB] | 54% | 129 |
| #4 | Quaticy | 50% | 28 |
| #5 | Cauz :/ | 46% | 67 |
| #6 | Kristen pesto | 43% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | |☆◾Mako | 8 | 0.0040 |
| #2 | Cauz :/ | 4 | 0.0030 |
| #3 | Not Croissant Du Baguette [NCB] | 3 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | Kristen pesto | 1 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Not Croissant Du Baguette [NCB] | 650 | 0.24 | 20 min |
| #2 | |☆◾Mako | 384 | 0.19 | 9 min |
| #3 | natsirT. | 280 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #4 | Cauz :/ | 141 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #5 | Kristen pesto | 94 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Not Croissant Du Baguette [NCB] | +1.45 | 68 | 84 |
| #2 | |☆◾Mako | +0.52 | 83 | 62 |
| #3 | Quaticy | +0.43 | 85 | 59 |
| #4 | natsirT. | +0.22 | 69 | 67 |
| #5 | Cream | -0.25 | 53 | 60 |





