








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 139 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 29 matches | ||
| Faceit | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
991 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,297 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 573 | 25% |
| Smokes | 445 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 733 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 546 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $272,146 of utility $137 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 132 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kristen pesto | 56% | 9 |
| #2 | Quaticy | 50% | 40 |
| #3 | 「Aethix」 | 47% | 19 |
| #4 | Cream | 46% | 67 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kristen pesto | 56% | 9 |
| #2 | Quaticy | 50% | 40 |
| #3 | 「Aethix」 | 47% | 19 |
| #4 | Cream | 46% | 67 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cream | 2 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | Kristen pesto | 2 | 0.0120 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cream | 228 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #2 | Quaticy | 96 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #3 | 「Aethix」 | 12 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| #4 | Kristen pesto | 10 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Quaticy | +0.96 | 87 | 61 |
| #2 | Cream | +0.13 | 53 | 54 |
| #3 | Cauz :/ | -0.05 | 81 | 56 |
| #4 | Kristen pesto | -2.05 | 52 | 35 |
| #5 | 「Aethix」 | -3.51 | 58 | 40 |





