








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1318 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 306 matches | ||
| Premier | 272 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 54 matches | ||
| Wingman | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 131 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




39 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9738 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 32,964 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7328 | 22% |
| Smokes | 11021 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 6171 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 8444 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,789,913 of utility $147 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 52 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Koalian | 60% | 108 |
| #2 | Hakan | 59% | 76 |
| #3 | darkrider | 58% | 96 |
| #4 | Nils | 56% | 562 |
| #5 | Slane | 56% | 435 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | gnad1.0 | 53% | 235 |
| #11 | niklasf1 | 52% | 240 |
| #12 | NachtschattN | 51% | 337 |
| #13 | Cylock | 48% | 118 |
| #14 | Toui | 46% | 57 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nils | 29 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | NachtschattN | 16 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | Slane | 12 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | niklasf1 | 9 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | cete | 9 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Slane | 1972 | 0.22 | 57 min |
| #2 | Nils | 1354 | 0.12 | 32 min |
| #3 | NachtschattN | 1284 | 0.18 | 37 min |
| #4 | niklasf1 | 822 | 0.16 | 23 min |
| #5 | gnad1.0 | 793 | 0.16 | 19 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cete | +1.72 | 75 | 69 |
| #2 | Koalian | +1.15 | 87 | 51 |
| #3 | Flo | +1.09 | 73 | 64 |
| #4 | Nils | +0.95 | 83 | 65 |
| #5 | darkrider | +0.89 | 79 | 54 |





