








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1215 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 304 matches | ||
| Premier | 295 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 17 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 96 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




49 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7990 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 28,183 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10368 | 37% |
| Smokes | 7905 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 4046 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 5864 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $864,195 of utility $58 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1928 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MythicKyle | 58% | 53 |
| #2 | Fatal. | 54% | 138 |
| #3 | SamWise | 53% | 55 |
| #4 | SamBox. | 51% | 237 |
| #5 | hakorN | 51% | 55 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | magzy | 49% | 168 |
| #7 | PotatoSamurai ジャガイモ侍 | 48% | 95 |
| #8 | ' Deadlyyy. | 45% | 154 |
| #9 | cymatic | 42% | 159 |
| #10 | RabGee | 39% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cymatic | 19 | 0.0055 |
| #2 | ' Deadlyyy. | 16 | 0.0048 |
| #3 | magzy | 15 | 0.0042 |
| #4 | SamBox. | 4 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | PotatoSamurai ジャガイモ侍 | 4 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SamBox. | 1311 | 0.25 | 36 min |
| #2 | magzy | 537 | 0.15 | 12 min |
| #3 | cymatic | 528 | 0.15 | 14 min |
| #4 | Fatal. | 424 | 0.14 | 11 min |
| #5 | ' Deadlyyy. | 380 | 0.12 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MythicKyle | +3.87 | 86 | 72 |
| #2 | SamBox. | +2.30 | 79 | 71 |
| #3 | FaZe_Prodigy | +1.23 | 75 | 68 |
| #4 | RabGee | +0.68 | 72 | 72 |
| #5 | hakorN | +0.26 | 68 | 36 |





