








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 440 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 257 matches | ||
| Esplay | 43 matches | 1,316 | |
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Renown | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 181 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




52 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2523 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,976 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1929 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1261 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 2049 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 2737 | 34% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,972,284 of utility $214 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 108 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | makke | 64% | 25 |
| #2 | Munanvatkaaja | Ei huono! | 59% | 34 |
| #3 | ASBINOH | 52% | 62 |
| #4 | Mataka | 48% | 33 |
| #5 | MAYHEMi | 47% | 76 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Oogie Boogie | 7 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | Munanvatkaaja | Ei huono! | 6 | 0.0081 |
| #3 | MAYHEMi | 5 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | Jone | 5 | 0.0037 |
| #5 | Flovi | 3 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Flovi | 288 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #2 | Jone | 281 | 0.21 | 8 min |
| #3 | Oogie Boogie | 244 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #4 | AukustiCat | 235 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #5 | ANgryCroCK | 233 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DJ FITME | +4.57 | 91 | 56 |
| #2 | Flovi | +2.89 | 51 | 77 |
| #3 | makke | +2.34 | 57 | 58 |
| #4 | Jone | +1.69 | 34 | 71 |
| #5 | Munanvatkaaja | Ei huono! | +1.65 | 44 | 73 |





