








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 395 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 142 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2383 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,606 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2258 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1911 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1612 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1825 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $441,945 of utility $106 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 720 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gamer123 | 71% | 55 |
| #2 | 0lseNツ | 71% | 41 |
| #3 | Eirikw0o | 64% | 75 |
| #4 | sirisakthenut | 59% | 149 |
| #5 | mek | 58% | 84 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | sebzi | 50% | 22 |
| #8 | Fossy | 45% | 22 |
| #9 | sleepless | 44% | 16 |
| #10 | Bondz | 44% | 32 |
| #11 | ✪gayboy69 | 36% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪gayboy69 | 16 | 0.0593 |
| #2 | sleepless | 10 | 0.0330 |
| #3 | sirisakthenut | 6 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | gamer123 | 5 | 0.0043 |
| #5 | dani | 2 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sirisakthenut | 277 | 0.08 | 8 min |
| #2 | mek | 241 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #3 | dani | 208 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #4 | gamer123 | 163 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #5 | Eirikw0o | 158 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | reAz | +3.81 | 74 | 70 |
| #2 | mek | +1.22 | 69 | 52 |
| #3 | 0lseNツ | +1.13 | 73 | 63 |
| #4 | dani | -0.33 | 54 | 55 |
| #5 | Fossy | -0.40 | 74 | 40 |





