








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 774 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 343 matches | ||
| Faceit | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 89 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




51 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5647 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,062 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4151 | 23% |
| Smokes | 4638 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 4531 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 4742 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,203,691 of utility $108 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 891 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wardy | 60% | 40 |
| #2 | Ne0soft | 54% | 39 |
| #3 | Eggle | 52% | 48 |
| #4 | !just jumpin around! | 50% | 34 |
| #5 | Rob | 50% | 187 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Ne0soft | 54% | 39 |
| #3 | Eggle | 52% | 48 |
| #4 | !just jumpin around! | 50% | 34 |
| #5 | Rob | 50% | 187 |
| #6 | Pringles | 34% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rob | 25 | 0.0063 |
| #2 | Pringles | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | Wardy | 1 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | !just jumpin around! | 1 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rob | 770 | 0.19 | 20 min |
| #2 | Eggle | 130 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #3 | Ne0soft | 127 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #4 | Pringles | 119 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #5 | Wardy | 112 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eggle | +4.38 | 89 | 65 |
| #2 | mute | +1.26 | 79 | 62 |
| #3 | Rob | +1.04 | 80 | 69 |
| #4 | Ne0soft | +0.13 | 54 | 50 |
| #5 | !just jumpin around! | -0.36 | 72 | 56 |





