








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 480 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 142 matches | ||
| Faceit | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 30 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1940 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,716 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1822 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1685 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1585 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1624 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $989,652 of utility $213 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 97 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | moneyCriminal | 86% | 14 |
| #2 | MaFy | 72% | 18 |
| #3 | Marko | 69% | 13 |
| #4 | sibe | 63% | 16 |
| #5 | Purtsi_ | 62% | 95 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Jaakkosan | 50% | 26 |
| #11 | The Haunted One | 49% | 68 |
| #12 | Ltd. | 48% | 23 |
| #13 | aleksi | 43% | 28 |
| #14 | SleepingArrow17 | 36% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SleepingArrow17 | 5 | 0.0057 |
| #2 | Jaakkosan | 5 | 0.0089 |
| #3 | CarlonJumala | 3 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | Purtsi_ | 3 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | The Haunted One | 3 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CarlonJumala | 804 | 0.30 | 23 min |
| #2 | The Haunted One | 309 | 0.21 | 9 min |
| #3 | Purtsi_ | 246 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #4 | Pude | 212 | 0.30 | 7 min |
| #5 | Jaakkosan | 172 | 0.31 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pude | +2.90 | 83 | 74 |
| #2 | Ltd. | +2.05 | 65 | 79 |
| #3 | aleksi | +1.61 | 71 | 59 |
| #4 | CarlonJumala | +1.11 | 72 | 79 |
| #5 | moneyCriminal | +0.73 | 69 | 54 |





