








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 261 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 68 matches | ||
| Premier | 25 matches | ||
| Esplay | 25 matches | 2,358 |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1659 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,163 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1604 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1841 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1037 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 1681 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $292,929 of utility $94 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 123 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | treckiz | 65% | 20 |
| #2 | hechtikal | 60% | 10 |
| #3 | lindeen | 59% | 27 |
| #4 | Rackeroh | 58% | 96 |
| #5 | P1ke Burgir | 57% | 81 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | P1ke Burgir | 57% | 81 |
| #6 | Z | 56% | 16 |
| #7 | king | 54% | 68 |
| #8 | JeyBeEye | 50% | 8 |
| #9 | kxg | 44% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kxg | 5 | 0.0273 |
| #2 | Rackeroh | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | P1ke Burgir | 2 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | king | 2 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | JeyBeEye | 2 | 0.0120 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | P1ke Burgir | 354 | 0.21 | 11 min |
| #2 | king | 353 | 0.25 | 11 min |
| #3 | Rackeroh | 204 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #4 | Z | 106 | 0.29 | 3 min |
| #5 | lindeen | 69 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kxg | +2.69 | 83 | 50 |
| #2 | San | +2.23 | 77 | 66 |
| #3 | lindeen | +0.81 | 91 | 69 |
| #4 | king | +0.49 | 83 | 69 |
| #5 | Rackeroh | +0.29 | 85 | 61 |





