








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 173 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
663 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,856 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 459 | 25% |
| Smokes | 354 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 580 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 463 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $446,715 of utility $242 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 70 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | maj | 60% | 15 |
| #2 | miles | 50% | 8 |
| #3 | saiyo | 50% | 14 |
| #4 | Reiji | 50% | 18 |
| #5 | krbb | 50% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | p0ke | 40% | 5 |
| #9 | Juggernaut_Panda | 33% | 12 |
| #10 | jodelexpress (dada) | 32% | 25 |
| #11 | funk | 17% | 6 |
| #12 | Styxxx Youngbone | 15% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jona | 4 | 0.0034 |
| #2 | jodelexpress (dada) | 3 | 0.0053 |
| #3 | maj | 3 | 0.0102 |
| #4 | Styxxx Youngbone | 2 | 0.0069 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jona | 194 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| #2 | rayc | 89 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #3 | jodelexpress (dada) | 88 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #4 | Juggernaut_Panda | 60 | 0.22 | 2 min |
| #5 | krbb | 57 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jona | +3.83 | 60 | 55 |
| #2 | maj | +3.78 | 84 | 67 |
| #3 | saiyo | +2.21 | 85 | 70 |
| #4 | krbb | +2.18 | 73 | 70 |
| #5 | rayc | +0.90 | 81 | 61 |





