








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 164 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 82 matches | ||
| Faceit | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1784 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,773 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1477 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1470 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1395 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1431 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $821,971 of utility $181 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 8 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Ikar | 50% | 56 |
| #9 | Kvotrix | 46% | 28 |
| #10 | DaanJe | 45% | 67 |
| #11 | Izanagi Onatah | 42% | 96 |
| #12 | Danny | 41% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Xewor🗿 | 21 | 0.0060 |
| #2 | Izanagi Onatah | 11 | 0.0055 |
| #3 | SupernalGzerg | 7 | 0.0076 |
| #4 | Fovez | 3 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | DaanJe | 3 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Xewor🗿 | 584 | 0.17 | 18 min |
| #2 | Fovez | 457 | 0.27 | 13 min |
| #3 | ✘ Szynek ✘ | 220 | 0.23 | 7 min |
| #4 | DaanJe | 142 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #5 | Izanagi Onatah | 117 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Xewor🗿 | +5.42 | 88 | 65 |
| #2 | Kvotrix | +2.06 | 71 | 61 |
| #3 | Fovez | +1.38 | 84 | 76 |
| #4 | Boski Bob | -0.04 | 73 | 56 |
| #5 | SupernalGzerg | -0.12 | 66 | 55 |





