








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 11 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 135 matches | ||
| Faceit | 56 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3298 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,131 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3013 | 27% |
| Smokes | 2731 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2662 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2725 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $628,004 of utility $104 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | クソ野郎 | 61% | 18 |
| #2 | Kleinert Baktung | 52% | 103 |
| #3 | Z1TCH | 52% | 224 |
| #4 | N1TO | 48% | 64 |
| #5 | Wisso | 48% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Z1TCH | 15 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | Kleinert Baktung | 2 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | クソ野郎 | 2 | 0.0048 |
| #4 | ϼɪxɛʟ | 2 | 0.0062 |
| #5 | N1TO | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Z1TCH | +1.17 | 82 | 69 |
| #2 | E1K1Z | +1.15 | 89 | 70 |
| #3 | Wisso | +0.90 | 82 | 67 |
| #4 | p | +0.19 | 85 | 61 |
| #5 | ϼɪxɛʟ | +0.10 | 64 | 49 |





