








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 491 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 125 matches | ||
| Esplay | 88 matches | 1,881 | |
| Faceit | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 30 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




42 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2276 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,699 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3016 | 28% |
| Smokes | 2142 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 3491 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 2050 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $878,270 of utility $142 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 448 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | criscros | 60% | 25 |
| #2 | Julio | 59% | 41 |
| #3 | purple | 57% | 77 |
| #4 | slunk1 | 54% | 71 |
| #5 | schna | 49% | 80 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | schna | +2.68 | 62 | 57 |
| #2 | purple | +2.52 | 71 | 56 |
| #3 | criscros | +0.53 | 80 | 73 |
| #4 | slunk1 | -0.49 | 52 | 69 |
| #5 | Julio | -1.01 | 35 | 39 |





