








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1176 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 955 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




46 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
16466 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 36,338 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 17359 | 48% |
| Smokes | 11261 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 6862 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 856 | 2% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,110,704 of utility $109 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 607 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ARMY|OF|JUAN | 79% | 86 |
| #2 | KiNgGlory | 79% | 126 |
| #3 | Warrior7912 | 76% | 67 |
| #4 | Lethal | 72% | 473 |
| #5 | Sheriff Randy | 70% | 117 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Warrior7912 | 76% | 67 |
| #4 | Lethal | 72% | 473 |
| #5 | Sheriff Randy | 70% | 117 |
| #6 | ♛ §UM †ING W◑NG ツ | 64% | 84 |
| #7 | bilbus | 63% | 82 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lethal | 24 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | KiNgGlory | 9 | 0.0038 |
| #3 | Sheriff Randy | 9 | 0.0039 |
| #4 | bilbus | 7 | 0.0044 |
| #5 | Warrior7912 | 6 | 0.0049 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KiNgGlory | 390 | 0.16 | 10 min |
| #2 | bilbus | 289 | 0.18 | 6 min |
| #3 | Sheriff Randy | 251 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #4 | ARMY|OF|JUAN | 216 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #5 | Lethal | 199 | 0.02 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Carrot | +3.22 | 94 | 73 |
| #2 | Lethal | +3.18 | 96 | 31 |
| #3 | KiNgGlory | +1.95 | 83 | 71 |
| #4 | Warrior7912 | +1.63 | 72 | 55 |
| #5 | bilbus | +1.58 | 85 | 54 |





