








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 195 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 160 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




55 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3115 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,271 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1907 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1121 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 1690 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1553 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $265,215 of utility $53 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1440 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Oppollopl | 58% | 96 |
| #6 | Doss | 56% | 178 |
| #7 | ◥◣Ukrainian Sniper◢◤ | 55% | 99 |
| #8 | Swabey | 48% | 29 |
| #9 | Dior | 47% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Doss | 22 | 0.0059 |
| #2 | Oppollopl | 14 | 0.0070 |
| #3 | Nxty | 12 | 0.0092 |
| #4 | Swabey | 10 | 0.0161 |
| #5 | Watch | 8 | 0.0034 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ◥◣Ukrainian Sniper◢◤ | 445 | 0.21 | 12 min |
| #2 | Doss | 378 | 0.10 | 9 min |
| #3 | Watch | 202 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #4 | Swabey | 160 | 0.26 | 4 min |
| #5 | SC - Solsmoove | 116 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Watch | +2.69 | 80 | 48 |
| #2 | MPhil thesis | +2.34 | 79 | 42 |
| #3 | Doss | +0.55 | 81 | 55 |
| #4 | Swabey | +0.14 | 73 | 57 |
| #5 | Oppollopl | -0.32 | 65 | 50 |





