








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1039 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 561 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 41 matches | ||
| Wingman | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 21 matches | ||
| Faceit | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 68 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




85 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9542 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 30,829 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7020 | 23% |
| Smokes | 6359 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 9393 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 8057 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,843,958 of utility $161 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1168 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝕵𝖎𝖗𝖊𝖓 | 58% | 177 |
| #2 | 🐺Xyoon🐺 | 56% | 316 |
| #3 | Clars4 | 54% | 186 |
| #4 | Kugra | 52% | 418 |
| #5 | Bozo | 52% | 63 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝕵𝖎𝖗𝖊𝖓 | 58% | 177 |
| #2 | 🐺Xyoon🐺 | 56% | 316 |
| #3 | Clars4 | 54% | 186 |
| #4 | Kugra | 52% | 418 |
| #5 | Bozo | 52% | 63 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kugra | 81 | 0.0095 |
| #2 | 🐺Xyoon🐺 | 26 | 0.0041 |
| #3 | Clars4 | 21 | 0.0054 |
| #4 | 𝕵𝖎𝖗𝖊𝖓 | 17 | 0.0046 |
| #5 | Bozo | 3 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kugra | 1585 | 0.18 | 34 min |
| #2 | 🐺Xyoon🐺 | 608 | 0.10 | 10 min |
| #3 | 𝕵𝖎𝖗𝖊𝖓 | 447 | 0.12 | 9 min |
| #4 | Clars4 | 159 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| #5 | Bozo | 88 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Krueny | +2.13 | 84 | 63 |
| #2 | 𝕵𝖎𝖗𝖊𝖓 | +1.33 | 86 | 49 |
| #3 | 🐺Xyoon🐺 | -0.68 | 66 | 44 |
| #4 | Bozo | -1.09 | 59 | 37 |
| #5 | Kugra | -1.24 | 74 | 55 |





