








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 127 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 30 matches | ||
| Premier | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1418 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,267 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1394 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1406 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1225 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 1242 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $491,911 of utility $169 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 105 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JachPot | 75% | 8 |
| #2 | Gabehasbongo | 62% | 26 |
| #3 | No Aim Dude | 61% | 18 |
| #4 | CaptainDiabetes | 60% | 10 |
| #5 | Toast | 60% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gabehasbongo | 4 | 0.0074 |
| #2 | No Aim Dude | 4 | 0.0108 |
| #3 | PLeX | 2 | 0.0103 |
| #4 | Goober -iwnl- | 1 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | Prodigy Toast | 1 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Goober -iwnl- | +2.62 | 65 | 69 |
| #2 | Gabehasbongo | +2.55 | 63 | 59 |
| #3 | No Aim Dude | +1.78 | 67 | 49 |
| #4 | vYriese | +1.14 | 66 | 61 |
| #5 | Toast | +0.87 | 69 | 54 |





